2004-12-31 - 3:30 a.m. : Night Owl
I don't understand why I go to bed so late. I just like it so much more. Other than the fact I actually get to talk to TokyoMom (who told you to live on the other side of the world anyhow?) I think it has to do with the fact I'm alone. I don't have to worry about someone requiring me to get up and accomodate them. There is no noise either. I really love that. I'm a big fan of silence.
See here's the thing. You know those personality tests? Type A vs Type B? I will never forget one of the questions on that test. I had to take one in high school. And one question asked how you "recharge your emotional batteries." It wanted to know if being around your friends or family made you feel refreshed or if you prefered to be alone. Back then I just was not sure how to answer but I've learned the truth. Really, I need to be alone to recharge the batteries. I don't recharge well around people. Being as that I am an outgoing person, I was supposed to choose the first one. But for whatever reason, that's just not the case. I have really hermitic tendencies some times. And yes I've related those times when I need to get out of here and go shop or something, anything. But I'm not exactly escaping the loneliness of my house-- I think at those times I'm escaping its residents. Which, don't get me wrong, I love my family, but really they make me twitch some times.
Today was a twitch day. M was just cranky as hell. He had no idea what he wanted- to eat or not to eat, to sleep or not to sleep, to play or not to play, to be carried or to not be carried. All he knew was he had to communicate it all in his whiny half-cry voice thing. Oh that grates me. All day. It wouldn't stop. And then J came home. And I don't know if it's me projecting on him or what but he annoyed the crap out of me the second he walked in. I honestly can't tell you of a single thing he did to rub me the wrong way but as a whole it just made me annoyed and pissy to just look at him. Maybe it's that whole thing where now since I'm on vacation I'm doing the stay at home mom thing again and I've always felt he treats me differently when I'm doing the stay at home mom thing. He gets more lazy around the house. He's all carefree. Or something! I don't know! Maybe I'm just crazy! But he just says and does things and I want to claw his eyes out.
You know that feeling! Don't look at me like you don't!
The other day, he asked (jokingly supposedly) if it was getting close to that time of the month. If I had super powers, I would have no husband right now because I would have melted the skin off of his face. And I would've started with his eyeballs.

On another note entirely. I am trying, yet again, to start and stick to some sort of skin regimen. It involves the daily use of aveeno daily cleansing pads followed by (2-3 times a week) neutrogena's blackhead treatment followed by aveeno facial moisturizer with spf 15. I also take a shower with aveda body polish and follow my shower with an application of the aveda moisturizer. And when I want to feel luxurious and tingly I use the aveda hand and foot creams. Since I received the aforementioned Aveda products on Christmas day, I have apparently desired to feel luxurious and tingly only twice.


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